Wolf, turtle and now crow...

From the early days of my childhood until around my 23rd year I felt the animal of guidance was the wolf for me. I still recall from my memory when I first saw the picture of this creature in a children's book. It felt so familiar, somehow I knew its existence forever. As a teenager I fantasized myself running among the trees with my long hair and transforming into a wolf. A big grey wolf. A wolf noble, a hunter and nature's balance keeper. Social and true to the pack. Fury and fluff. A rough side to help one survive and a soft side to help one communicate and bond with feelings and emotions. I searched for my pack but finally the wondering gave me some good seasons but at the end I was alone searching again...

There was a blank period with the fading wolf, especially my military days when I wished for a wolf chain breaker. I was and still am nobody's dog...

Then came another dream. A dream of ancestors and ruins with pillars, down the side of a mountain in a gorge. I saw my venerable, long dead, grandfather pointing me to a sea turtle swimming calmly through the serene waters of an ocean. Paradox as in every dream was the moment I stood upon a river and I decided to slow my pase when like a kind tutor the ghost of my grandfather remind me of the characteristics I had inherited and all the good things he have taught me. Then I decided there was a time for hard work but without pressure as success isn't permanent but good habits are. Like the turtle was set to live a thousand years as time is relevant too. Turtle was the stability in a very chaotic, from every aspect, period in my life. Hardened into the defensive cell with again a soft inner core I was able to deflect misfortune and continue to grow under pressure. Turtle was the escape from the static waters of life. 

Third phase, started I believe a few days now as I see crows everywhere and every time they do the same. They fly and sit in the lampposts on my left. This isn't the romantic crow of the past. This crow is the bird of the seer. The bird of the prophecy the bird of wisdom and intelligence. We might cheat a bit, play the trickster, the great joke. As life progresses and those who fear not death can get the benefits of this perspective. Crows, birds of Odin, Huginn and Muninn also know as thought and memory. In a crazy world that has forgotten to look deep inside may I be the wandering man with the stories to tell... my soul is old after all.

First I run hungry towards life, then I swim the slow flows and now I fly above, seeing things others cannot...